Turkey Defender Gifts

"What the ... they've scheduled my surgery for Thanksgiving."

Turkey with an ax to grind.

"Are you the guys who ate my brother!?"

"I’ll give you an ‘Inconvenient Truth’!"

Are you the guy who ate my brother?

'So far we're holding off overseas competition.'

"Brutus! Attack with reasonable force!"

'How long did you try before calling?'

'I think your son is being bullied. He's suffering 80% Chinese wrist burns.'

"Bloody cold-callers - I'm gonna give him a piece of my mind. . .!!"

Fish with Shield

We all have our jobs to do here --- You guard against burglars and I'm the food critic.

'Your task will be to save the castle from catapulted rocks.'

'You expect me to play with educational toys during SUMMER VACATION?'

Art Theft

'I hear a burglar downstairs, the poor fool.'

"This'll be our first Christmas together."

'Turbidity is pretty high today, better keep the kids inside...'

Man with fly swat - Let the games begin.

"Tech savvy? o. Is there any call for regular savvy?"

'This is my toughest soldier -- He's been through Mom's vacuum cleaner eight times!'

"You poor thing. Let's get you cleaned up."

"My husband has a thing about double glazing salesmen."

'My land line is always busy...that's my answering machine fending off robocalls.'

'Quick, get word to Mighty Trout'

How do you keep cats out of your garden? I catch the little sneaks

"We'd like to promote the concept of a nontraditional Thanksgiving."

Boxer Scarecrow Fends of the Crows.

Turkey Hostage.

"Are there people who don't live in London?"

Pest Control

'It's a survival trick: I'm making sure the fur-traders have no interest in my hide...'

"I quit."

'It's amazing what they throw away: a tracksuit, a dozen oranges and another 2-0 lead.'

"Don't give me this stupid 'Renaissance' stuff! - The Middle Ages were good enough for my father and they're good enough for me!"