Turkey Defender T-Shirts

Turkey with an ax to grind.

"Are you the guys who ate my brother!?"

"I’ll give you an ‘Inconvenient Truth’!"

Are you the guy who ate my brother?

'So far we're holding off overseas competition.'

"Brutus! Attack with reasonable force!"

'How long did you try before calling?'

'I think your son is being bullied. He's suffering 80% Chinese wrist burns.'

'Your task will be to save the castle from catapulted rocks.'

Fish with Shield

"Bloody cold-callers - I'm gonna give him a piece of my mind. . .!!"

'You expect me to play with educational toys during SUMMER VACATION?'

Art Theft

'I hear a burglar downstairs, the poor fool.'

'Turbidity is pretty high today, better keep the kids inside...'

Man with fly swat - Let the games begin.

'Quick, get word to Mighty Trout'

"Tech savvy? o. Is there any call for regular savvy?"

'My land line is always busy...that's my answering machine fending off robocalls.'

"My husband has a thing about double glazing salesmen."

'This is my toughest soldier -- He's been through Mom's vacuum cleaner eight times!'

"We'd like to promote the concept of a nontraditional Thanksgiving."

"Are there people who don't live in London?"

Turkey Hostage.

Pest Control

'It's amazing what they throw away: a tracksuit, a dozen oranges and another 2-0 lead.'

"I quit."

Boxer Scarecrow Fends of the Crows.

'It's a survival trick: I'm making sure the fur-traders have no interest in my hide...'

"Don't give me this stupid 'Renaissance' stuff! - The Middle Ages were good enough for my father and they're good enough for me!"

'This has been taking up all of my time.'

'Maybe you should ease up on the burglar.'

"I don't let them bite. They just do."