Tudor Tales Gifts

Lady Jane Grey

Santa Claus's wife beats the soot out of his beard.

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Dead Cat Crown Jewels

',,, and if anyone knows of a reason why these two should not be married, let them storm this castle with pitchforks and torches or forever hold their peace,'

'I don't care what the blueprints say, I'm certain HE strongly suggested a roof.'

Welcome to Stratford-On-Avon...Birthplace of William Shakespeare...Park not here, lest ye be towed!

Knights of the bedside table.

',,,And we'd really like a heart for the Tin Man,,,'

William Shakespeare

Thomas Cranmer

A rare picture of Henry VIII's divorce lawyer.

My, grandma, what a big premium you have for a plan that doesn't cover getting eaten by a wolf.

The hare and the tortoise - the rematch.

Every time I get a postcard from your brother, I regret that I carved him out of driftwood.

The Tennis Racket in the Stone

'Anne Boleyn now regrets avoiding that Prenup Chit Chat with King Henry.'

'I know how you like things to be clean, so I gave fishy a bath!"

'If straw and sticks don't appeal, I do have something in brick that might interest you.'

Edmund Spenser

Elizabeth I

Executioner with golf bag full of axes

"It's from Henry VIII, sire. He's going to be in town and wants to know where the best hook-up spots are."

'She has great communication skills.'

Summon King Henry's bugle teacher! Bring on the Tudor Tooter Tutor!

"I'm failing 16th century British History, so now I have to get a Tudor."

Alice Through the Looking Glass - Alice and the Red Queen.

"It's too hot to strive for autonomy."

Dog pointing to turkey who stole his dog cone.

1588: Queen Elizabeth I returns from her holidays

"Swipe left." Henry VIII

"Jekyll, old man - I think you've made my wife's drink a bit too strong."

Thomas Wolsey

Henry VIII

"You're sitting in my place!"

Henry VIII