Tray Label Aficionado Gifts

Trays on desk read, 'Here', 'There' and, 'Neither here nor there.'

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

Race track - with the race being to apply the white lines between lanes

'I love this supermarket; they have the easiest to understand wine department.'

". . . but he's almost four and he hasn't been labelled yet!"

We Never Look at Prices Shop.

"Pretty label... shiny bottle... I'll take it!"

Archeology Dept. Storage. Ernie, this box should be labeled "unidentified pottery fragments," not "pots unknown."

"Boneless, gluten free, vegan, grass fed, free range, bananas."

Tofu: Firm, Soft, Amusingly Jiggly

'Can't you come up with something more elegant than 'Dave's Homemade Booze'?'

Tube men dancing.

'That wasn't the home movie. That was the trailer.'

Prince.

I've seen an awful lot of movies ever since they cut them all down to two minutes. What on earth are you talking about, little buddy? I watched more than 80 movies last night on Hulu, for free. Are you talking about trailers? When it shows the beginning, middle and end, it's a movie.

"Do you have a white on the fruity side, with maybe a possum on the label?"

"I read all package labels for my health. Now my eyes are shot!"

"This year I'm just planting the little signs."

'A masters in nutrition, Ph.D. in biochemistry - you'll be perfect for writing our labels.'

"This brand of sugar looks good. The first ingredient is whole wheat flour."

'Maybe you should let the wine you packed go to waste. That's the bag with our laundry.'

"How do we know the label isn't on upside down?"

'This chicken was raised on a farm, ate corn and never consumed drugs. That's more than I knew about you when we dated.'

'I hear there was a power cut at the stadium.' - 'Yes, the hare came third.'

Spring Water - 0% Trans Fat.

'Caution: this tomato soup combines with our chicken noodle soup can form a lethal nerve gas.'

'If food products were honestly labeled...'

Man posting a letter in his office faced with various openings

Ultimate generics.

"Say - do we really want to bury this Armani necktie?"

Simon Cowell caricature.

Bookstore. I thought you wanted a book on tape. This is a book on tape. It's about the 3M Company.

Spies who are lousy at hiding in plain sight.

Designer Fit

'Her clothes are by Gucci, but her checks are by Rubbermaid.'