Transylvanian Tales Fan T-Shirts

"Go on, Van Helsing, make my night!"

"Agamemnon and Clytemnestra have decided to separate amicably."

Robinson decided to name him 'Casual Friday'.

Alice in Wonderland: The Queen Turns into a Pack of Cards.

"The guide book sys it's the best B.&B. in the Carpathians."

"Barnes is morphing into some kind of strange creature. I warned him about eating out of the vending machines."

Odysseus starts regretting his return to Ithaca.

Subway Thrillers

Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Coffee

First Transsylvanian Blood Bank

Beauty and the Beast

Moses comes to Los Angeles.

Jolly Sailor - Warning: May contain old salts.

'Take Gerald a cup of punch or something, I think he's feeling left out.'

'The Moving Finger Writes; And, Having Writ, Moves On To A Three Week, Twenty City Book Tour.'

'Another triple, Joe -I'm trying to forget several women.'

Circus trousers

'Go to Hell'

"You look good for your age."

"It's not 'Kafkaesque,' it's equal opportunity."

'When I think of all the men I could've married...'

'Yes, the owners are giraffes...Did I forget to mention it?...'

'Is THAT it? You call THAT turning into a prince?'

'Brian hated his long legs and dinner parties'

'Sorry Mr Wolf, but your neighbours have complained again about you 'marking' your territory...'

'You just grew three inches.'

The Woman of Samaria Meets Jesus (The Holy Bible).

"She was a dish when we ran away together but that was a long time ago."

Queen Ranavola of Madagascar executed any of her subjects who appeared in her dreams....

"The adventures of Robin Hood are becoming a lot less adventurous."

"It's a selfie!"

"Alice finds that the looking glass is made of lexan, and she can't get through it."

"Ok, ok, my mistake—twice upon a time..."

'Okay buddy, we're taking this van to Transylvania.'

'It happens every night - just as you're trying to get some sleep,he starts fluttering about'.