Tavern Tales Aficionados T-Shirts

'Another triple, Joe -I'm trying to forget several women.'

'Couldn't Peter claim Mr. McGregor's garden was an 'attractive nuisance?'

Fishing Tales

The Tale of the Tape of the Tail.

Fishing Boat Derby

"That's right kiddo, I'm one of the original band members of the Musicians of Bremen..."

Paul Bunyan gets the leg-lengthening Operation

'This bottle of whisky will give you 'Dutch courage', it's the best I can do.'

'All this is nuthin! There was one yeaw up noth...when it snowed fah two yeaws! I had t'dig down ten feet t'haul in my lobstah traps.'

Men reading Tall Stories, and Short Stories in a Library

"Yes, I was using my mobile whilst driving... I was calling the police to tell them I was chasing a gang of bank robbers!"

"At long last, Wyatt, our dream has come true and we are within reach of the legendary toast fields of the Sierra Madre."

Jolly Sailor - Warning: May contain old salts.

A Salmon Lie

'Take Gerald a cup of punch or something, I think he's feeling left out.'

"Pecos Bildungsroman"

Captain Eddie's New Boat:'The insurance company laughed last year when I insisted on adding Kraken coverage.'

'Sure you always catch bigger fish than me. Your arms are a foot longer than mine.'

'He doesn't exaggerate, he just remembers big.'

"Wouldn't it be cool to live in the middle ages, Randy? We could roam the countryside on horses and carry swords?"

'You've had enough!'

'That's right kids: I jumped through rings of fire when I was with the Circus!'

Circus trousers

"So I break free and I swear that hook was this big."

"You look good for your age."

'Women don't simply believe everything we hear, you know.' - 'But that does not stop you repeating it.'

Paul Bunyon, Castaway

'Yes, the owners are giraffes...Did I forget to mention it?...'

'I don't believe for one minute that an octopus crawled up last night and ate all the coconuts!'

"This is your great-great-uncle Enchilmo Ladas. We called him 'Enchi' for short."

'He's lying about either a fish or his penis.'

A Tale of the Sea

"In your original statement, you said the fish was much bigger."

"His nose grew every time he lied? That must've taken all the fun out of fishing."