Transit Trekker Gifts

"How do you say ‘Where is the bathroom’ in Sanskrit?"

"I feel off. I want to feel off and running."

Nature Lovers

School trip little porters.

Future Tents

'I need it for my electric blanket.'

'We can probably make Mars in one day.'

'How come they know where we are when we don't.'

"Does the No. 1 stop here and does that go to Penn Station and can I get a train there to Philadelphia and then how do I get to Walnut Street?"

Gym: Back and Forth or Going Nowhere.

Man with twisted legs using a twisted walking stick.

"It's one mile as the crow flies, ten miles as the lost hiker bushwhacks."

'I need to lose enough pounds to take a thirty-five meal cruise!'

"Why did you just dump my kiwi-colada smoothie on my head?" "I'm glad you (huff) asked." "Studies (huff) show that sitting all (huff) day long behind a desk leads (huff) to obesity, sickness, (huff) toe-swelling (huff) and an early, (huff) excruciating (huff) death." "So more (huff) and more (huff) office workers are using (huff) standing desks (huff) with treadmills." "Have you ever (huff) tried handing someone (huff) a smoothie while running (huff) on a treadmill?" "They walk. ...walk."

"Hey. . . in use!"

"Courtney: Raised by hamsters"

'Uh, we do have tenure, don't well?

Speed enforced by really slow walkers.

"We don't have a gym, but your parking space is six miles away."

'I got the idea from the parks department.'

Have you seen the other tent pole?

"Well Carter, according to the map, this is where the Rainforest begins."

'Says here that if you meet a bear in the woods, never try to outrun it!'

"My husband and I have been unsuccessful in booking our holiday over the internet"

A woman rides a treadmill as she chases a cookie jar on a refridgerator.

'Oh, great! We've been going round in right-angled triangle.'

Champagne area.

"I thought this was a little heavier than usual."

'We have to shorten all depot platforms, we misconvernted inches into centimeters and designed the train too wide.'

'About this trip to the Amazon jungle...I want my money back!'

Stuck in the stile.

Mountaintop Dessert

Woods: caution slippery when elm.

City Hike