Transit Planner Gifts

"I know the D train would have been faster, brainiac, but the B has a quiet authority."

Public Transportation Communication

Tourists

'This country is on the road to ruin.' - 'Well, it'll never get there in this traffic.'

Man packing suitcase with French vocabulary

"He didn't do anything, Gregory. This is a zoo"

'He's bound to wake up sometime!'

'Next year I'm hiring a tank!'

'Are we broke yet?'

'We don't know which gate flight 311 to Denver is boarding. These are the menus.'

An alleyway leads to a scenic area.

"There is a 5 month slow down. You are still on the fastest route. You will arrive next year."

BIG BOOK OF CAMPER VAN NAMES

Monday: Next 7 exits.

"For the last time, we never need the route with the fewest turns."

"Why is it every time I need to go somewhere, the driverless car is taking itself for a spin?"

Columbus discovers ...that when exploring, it's not such a great idea to bring the family along.

"I'm pretty sure my self-driving car is moonlighting for Uber behind my back."

'You're going on a long journey. Have you got an OAP's bus pass?'

Car leaving highway crashes through 'EXIT HERE' sign.

'Caution Speed Bump Ahead.'

"I think I found a location for our vacation."

Tolls: Must have exact change and tails up.

"'COST: shedloads, COMPLETION DATE: God knows.' Perhaps you'd care to flesh out some details for us."

"Remember, if we get split up, take the A to 42nd, transfer to the Brooklyn bound 2, get off at Eastern parkway and buy a ticket for the Brooklyn Museum and make sure to tell them you're under three."

You have a major fiasco at 10:30, followed by a shocking scandal at 2:15.

Carpool lane (a car driving into a long pool).

HS2

Car Emissions

Face it, Bob, we're lost. Welcome to Faceitbobwe'relost pop. 2.

A mental-health spot quiz, Al: "A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single … Google search of travel websites"?

"Will you be flying through to Toledo, or attempting to leave mid-air?"

"The cost of HS2 was 115 billion, but that was when we started the interview. It's 130 now!"

"It's even more controversial than uber. It's a driverless taxi."

The Transition Oz team on their way to Totnes to get advice on Reskilling, Transport, Oil Dependancy and overcoming Post Petroleum Stress Disorder.