Trainee Solicitor Gifts

'Trainee solicitor, please help.'

"I'd say you're ideally suited to be a solicitor, Mr Henshaw Henshaw Hanshaw and Spratt."

'What amazes me most is that years ago I couldn't even spell teacher - now I are one!'

"After I graduate middle school, high school and college, I'll go to law school to get you out of this. But I want my retainer now."

"I hope you don't mind - I'm training a brand-new assistant and I've asked her to check your blood pressure."

"As a rookie, I'm finding one of the hardest things to get used to is older people calling me 'sir.'"

"If you do well in your first practicum, you can move on to teaching real children."

'Your Honor, my client pleads not guilty by reason of a sugar buzz.'

'I was a junior doctor when I started this shift.'

'Great. Another trainee lawyer.'

Orthopedics. Pediatrics. Stuff they never taught your in nursing school.

"I can't find my box of magic tricks. Have you seen it?"

"While your lesson plans were perfect, and your bulletin boards were terrific...your classroom management skills need work!"

Manager reading The Little Trainee That Could: 'I think I can, I think I can...'

'So let this be a lesson to you Courtney, 'there's no people like showpeople!''

'No, Johnny - first you punch the airholes, and then you put in the hamster!'

"Do I have to pay the plaintiff the same amount again for each rerun of my case on TV?"

NHS application system: 'Let me in! I'm a Junior Doctor!'

'Virtual patient.'

"It's not for soaking your feet. . . it's a bed pan."

STRIP Hambone: Training wheels on a computer

'He still hasn't got the hang of it.'

"Oh, don't worry. Typical beginner's mistake."

Survey says there are still a quarter of trainee GPs to stay in full-time clinical work

'Yeah, I've got the new guy working on table wines. He seems to be getting the hang of it.'

'I don't think much of your work experience scheme Eric!'

"Nothing beats the thrill of operating beyond one's competence."

"I know you're new to the job, Ms. Jones, but the correct term is 'stat'... not 'move your ass'!"

"Trainee Baristas Queue Here"

Do as many study days as you can

'Our clientele is middle class; you know, your average Joe-750ml.'

He's working his way up to lions!

"But the good news is that if you get a life threatening illness...then you'd get a decent payout."

'Or there's a budget treatment with one of our trainees...'

'If you're so easily grossed out, why did you go to medical school?'