Traffic Survey Chuckler Gifts

Early traffic survey

"G.P.S. FOR GUYS"

Actual Extent Of Doug's Off - Road Adventures (Touching the kerb)

'I'm sorry Timmy, but if I keep going for help, you'll never learn to take care of yourself,'

Darwin first tested his theory in a letter to a magazine ('Lookalike' letter points to similarity between man and ape.)

"When Butcher Bob gets back from lunch this one is getting a vasectomy."

'Fancy a swift half?'

People on the train reading each other's books - only it's the same as their own.

'I'm referring you to a specialist who isn't as afraid to die as I am.'

'Ain't no lonelier life than being a free-range chicken boy.'

'I worked briefly in a Fine-China shop, but it didn't work out...'

'The hair plugs are that noticeable, huh?'

'It's going to be hard to get lost in these woods!'

"Here's the problem. Your computer isn't obsolete, you are."

Corona virus: "Wow, I seem to be getting lots of attention lately."

'I think cowboys are just plain lazy: Why else would you have to carry them all the time?'

'Don't tell me you weren't speeding back there. When you drove by me, all I could see was a blur.'

"Isn't this just a repeat of his 1332 Christmas special."

'Step One...a pie chart is not dessert.'

Man sees line of priests entering Mass Transit Authority.

"The worst mimes are those who pretend to wash your windshield, yet expect to get paid."

'Get with it, buddy -- that mile of highway you adopted has snow all over it!'

"Pandemic! That's a pretty name."

STRIP Hambone: Computer health analysis

'Oh no, I've been clamped!'

How come Mercury gets the car pool lane? He's alone and we've got all these moons!

'Bless you!'

BOTTOMLINE: Highroad...Lowroad

"I keep getting into a flap."

All Day Parking $1. Leave keys. It may be necessary to move your car to a more convenient spot.

J-J-JOE'S B-B-BAR, 'Actually, Joe's done pretty well for a guy with a speech impediment.'

Section 21, Paragraph B: When two or more vehicles come to a stop simultaneously, the most expansive vehicle enjoys the right of way.

"Sorry to pull you over, but do you realize how fast you weren't going?"

Is it true that all cats are free thinkers? Yeah, we can't stand dogma.

"I'm not on the train today dear, I've got flu."