Traffic Stop Humorist Gifts

"The test calls for a pirouette, sir. Arabesques don't really tell us enough."

Do you know why I pulled you over again?

'Here - talk to my lawyer!'

Push for Disco...

'Do you know how fast you were going?'

"Good evening, sir, may I see your drinking licence please?"

Alabama Traffic Jam

'It's a slow trap.'

"Ma'am, do you realize how fast you were... going?"

"Hey! Buddy! This is an interdimensional 4/3π way stop!"

Give Way To Cyclists

Speed bump in honor of JD Yomp 1866-1957 - Inventor of Asphalt.

"The Seven Warning Signs of Seven Warning Signs"

'Harold, your right turn signal is still 'on'.'

"So this is the secret to the start of labour!"

Toad roadkill.

"It was due to ice!. . . Yes, I dropped my popsicle in my lap!"

"Move over, pardner, yer ridin' in the horsepool lane!"

Bumper sticker reads: 'I'd rather be text messaging.'

Snail Crossing.

A license plate that reads LIC-PLT

Visual Gag: Caution Goose Bump

'We learned one thing today - NO parking on the yellow lions!'

'Look on the bright side, Officer, I've reduced the electrical consumption of an entire neighborhood.'

Move to Arizona.

'I wasn't walking, officer. I was jogging.'

Yield. Stop. We went out a couple of times, but I got tired of the mixed signals.

'Mr. Evans, it's a speeding ticket. You can't pleas insanity.'

'I was stuck in traffic for two hours on the way here, so I have my urine sample ready.'

'Not so hard on the braking, Mrs. Buggins!'

"Over the speed limit, are you sure?"

Digital Communication.

"Where's the red cape, pal?"

Car driver in bus lane: 'But I am a bus driver officer, it's my day off.'

'There's a delay on the expressway: A truck loaded with peanut butter is spread across three lanes causing a traffic jam.'