Traffic Stop Humor Gifts

"Good evening, sir, may I see your drinking licence please?"

Laughing Zone Ahead

'Do you know how fast you were going?'

Actual Extent Of Doug's Off - Road Adventures (Touching the kerb)

'It's a slow trap.'

"Ma'am, do you realize how fast you were... going?"

"Hey! Buddy! This is an interdimensional 4/3π way stop!"

Give Way To Cyclists

Speed bump in honor of JD Yomp 1866-1957 - Inventor of Asphalt.

'Harold, your right turn signal is still 'on'.'

"So this is the secret to the start of labour!"

Toad roadkill.

'A metal plate in your head does not qualify as a helmet.'

A license plate that reads LIC-PLT

How come Mercury gets the car pool lane? He's alone and we've got all these moons!

"The worst mimes are those who pretend to wash your windshield, yet expect to get paid."

'We learned one thing today - NO parking on the yellow lions!'

Snail Crossing.

Bumper sticker reads: 'I'd rather be text messaging.'

"Move over, pardner, yer ridin' in the horsepool lane!"

Visual Gag: Caution Goose Bump

'I don't mind a medical but I think that's a bit much!

'You were doing the speed limit. I ofund that suspicious.'

'Look on the bright side, Officer, I've reduced the electrical consumption of an entire neighborhood.'

Move to Arizona.

'Not so hard on the braking, Mrs. Buggins!'

'Mr. Evans, it's a speeding ticket. You can't pleas insanity.'

'I wasn't walking, officer. I was jogging.'

"Over the speed limit, are you sure?"

"The test calls for a pirouette, sir. Arabesques don't really tell us enough."

Digital Communication.

Car driver in bus lane: 'But I am a bus driver officer, it's my day off.'

"Where's the red cape, pal?"

'Ultra High Occupancy Lane, 300 Persons per Car.'

"Do you know why I pulled you over?"