Traffic Safety Satirist Pillows

Seat Belt Cop.

Caution: Driver Watching "Hard Copy"

'Another one? Do you realize it will make the third time this month we've held a fire drill?'

Push for Disco...

'Do you know how fast you were going?'

Driving on the Beach - Lifeguard on a hydraulic lift.

Mountain Climber With Pillow Padding.

Safety Barriers

"I didn't see the coffee table in the middle of the room, due to my visual impairment, caused by the rubbish light emitted by the government approved 150 watt energy saving bulb in my apartment..."

Fire door.

"Ya know, that cork was there for a reason."

Fume Leaks on aeroplane - 'Perfume? Drinks? Air?'

'It's a slow trap.'

"Ma'am, do you realize how fast you were... going?"

'Chef told me I had to have guard before I used the mixer!'

Give Way To Cyclists

'The most important safety rule to follow when doing anything dangerous is to first find out who can sue you when you get hurt.'

'Coins, when swallowed, cause cancer. Perhaps money should be banned.'

'As a part of a cost-cutting experiment all of our safety measures will be replaced with these good luck charms.'

Health & Safety Official Tester.

Jet Turbine Testing Area

"Safe? Of course it's safe! I do fireworks every year!"

Another use for retired sumo wrestlers: Roundabout ahead.

'I'm bored, what can I do?' 'Go and play with your Junior Bomb Disposal kit.'

Danger: Reading warning signs costs lives.

'I baked it especially for you.'

Speed bump in honor of JD Yomp 1866-1957 - Inventor of Asphalt.

Living life dangerously 2010.

'Oh no, he's only the Health and Safety Officer.'

Security at the Smaller Airports

Speed laws occasionally enforced.

"What makes you think we have to contact OSHA?"

Department of Health and Safety: Knock (but not too loudly or you may suffer knuckle bruising) And Enter (Beware of tripping over the fireproof carpet).

'Harold, your right turn signal is still 'on'.'

Toad roadkill.