Traffic Pattern Observer Gifts

Cake Walk.

'Can you see what's causing the hold up?'

'Wow, these lights stay on the red cycle for a very long time.'

"[Old Steak Bone Tavern]"

'It's a slow trap.'

You Know You're Old When...

The successful rubbernecker...

Cat taunts dog at intersection.

"Now, son, hitting a car is all about timing. You'll want to release about here..."

"Since I no longer trust the media. I get all my news from hysterical people on the street."

"Great. Now we'll probably miss all the lights between here and earth."

Play Rush Hour

"The soft, flexible, extendible bumper gently nudges the cyclist safely out of harm's way."

'I turned the corner and hit the tree. It was all over in a matter of hours.'

65. Whenever I'm in the mood to watch the rest of the world go by, I simply keep to the legal speed limit.

Drive Thru Police Station

"When are you gonna tell him he's in the protest convoy and not a queue for petrol?"

Crossing the Road

"Ma'am, do you know why I pulled you over?"

'Accelerate! Coffin Dodgers Crossing.'

'I know, I know. You're stripes. I get it, already.'

Congestion of the Electric Car

"Business sure picked up since the highway went through."

'The miles per gallon it gets for city driving is an urban legend.'

"And now for a terrific report: There is..."

BOTTOMLINE: Highroad...Lowroad

'After being on my site all day, it's nice to see some traffic.'

First place / Second place next exit.

'Just like the website, lots of visitors, few conversions.'

Man thinking it's safer driving a tank

A vampire is positioned upside down at a bus stop, looking at its cell phone.

Crowd Funding Toll Booth.

No Smoking . . . No Mobile Phones . . . No looking out of the window.

"The light is green..."

'Boy, glad i'm not out there amongst all that driving rain!'