Traditional Recipe Lover Gifts

Healthy Eating.

Grandma's caf

'Is this still America?'

Full English Breakfast.

Get your no-turkey recipes here! Eco club. Go veggie for T-day! No thanks! I like turkey, sausage, stuffing, creamed onions with bacon and mincemeat pie. I figured as much. How can you tell? Gut check. That's my gut reaction, too.

"Was there a photo in the recipe book? I'd love to see what it's meant to look like."

'I told you I only cook with my mother's Italian spices. She just left Naples and should be here with them in about eight hours.'

"You betrayed her trust. You added spices to her soup. In Tia Carmen's eyes, you are an irresponsible youngster...and I don't blame her for doing this."

"The recipe? Well, there's lentils, garlic, tofu, and a pinch of our illegal secret ingredient."

"I dreamed that butter and sugar and eggs came back, and we all made cookies."

"Baldo, I don't like you eating that nasty food!"

Indian hollowing out log for a canoe sees woodpecker pecking his log

Endangered Entrees

"Cheese fondue has gone wherever crepes Suzette and tuna Mornay went."

"It's an old family recipe - some flour and water, yeast, a little salt, mono calcium phosphate, polysorbate 60, calcium propionate..."

'Do you have any Cheese and Pickle?

'Ok. We've tried monkey's paw, eye of newt, bat's blood and raven's claw.'

'A wee bowl of porridge can set you up for the day!'

"It's steak and chips, it is what the ploughman had for lunch!"

Recipes from the Revised Senior Citizen Cookbook

"I resolve to cook more traditional meals like my lengua casserole and pig's feet stew!"

"How long have we been married?"

"...brisket ...recipe. Hide it."

"I'm a meat and potatoes guy in a kale and tofu world."

"Mmmmm, harissa dusted haricot vert. That sounds much more interesting than green beans with pepper powder."

"Thanksgiving is politically incorrect, turkey is politically incorrect, yams with marshmallow fluff are politically incorrect - and disgusting."

Health care success #3

"Fine! Tell Tia Carmen the truth, tell her you don't like her stew! But be prepared to live with the consequences, young man."

Welsh Cakes

"Dad, are we a minority group?"

Ghak Eisenthal invented the chicken fricassee.

'You dope. You bought Hamburger Helper, but this is lamb.'

'I'd say he's tried Mrs Beeton's Recipe for a disaster.'

"It says the box contains all the ingredients needed for a delicious chicken dinner."

'...and we add a couple of drops of our secret, habit-forming ingredient to each order.'