Touchdown Titans Pillows

'Uh-oh ... Manning got hit hard, and he's not getting up.'

'...However, he is such a heck of a nice guy, we're going to give him the touchdown anyway.'

Input From The Front Office

'But you said to clean my room.'

American Football.

"This guy's a terrific defensive lineman. I once saw him chase down a quakerback for nearly 40 yards before sacking him. It was in a shopping mall, but still..."

'Hey dude, just got the SMS of the Wild...'

'The Wilsons picked up a quarterback in the off-season. The Riveras picked up a quarterback. The Ludwigs picked up a quaterback...'

Football.

'I've decided to skip my senior year and go directly into an endless cycle of unrealistic expectations and failure.'

'He's checking with his agent to see if it's okay to score a try!'

"Oh, wait. He's on their side."

A football player accidentally kicks off the head of another football player.

Megan Anna Rapinoe

"Let's do exactly what these pundits in the halftime report said we should do. If we lose, we'll blame them!"

"You're back! You're really back...!"

'My turn! Kick me next!!'

Stop the big guy!

At least Sunday is still a holy day.

'He hibernates between superbowls.'

"Junior, there's more to life than winning. There's also getting compensation for closed-head injuries."

Friendly fire!

'Get the stretcher! He's got a mole on his leg that looks a little funky!!'

Just sitting here kicking field goals (smiley face emoji)

'Whoa! Don't try to be a hero. It's too late for Dan, but let this be a lesson...'

"Sometimes I think all this post game analysis has gone too far."

'No slapping, Wilson! We don't start full-contact drills until tomorrow!'

Football

'Look up... Look down... Look at my thumb. Gee, You're...'

Head Coach, Offensive Coordinator, Post-Touchdown Choreographer

'Upon further review, the ruling on the field is upheld. The catch was totally constitutional. Touchdown!'

'Quick! sell me a lure,any lure,I just found an empty compartment in my tackle box.'

'That was some hit!'

"I take serious offense to their offense. And I am feeling very defensive about our defense. Would somebody give me a damn hug? Now Please?"

'We're a coalition force, ref.'