Touchdown Trendsetter Pillows

'He's checking with his agent to see if it's okay to score a try!'

'...However, he is such a heck of a nice guy, we're going to give him the touchdown anyway.'

Input From The Front Office

'The Wilsons picked up a quarterback in the off-season. The Riveras picked up a quarterback. The Ludwigs picked up a quaterback...'

"Football is too dangerous, Junior. Why not follow my footsteps in a safe sport - chasing investment yield?"

American Football.

Punishment for the kicker.

Football.

'I've decided to skip my senior year and go directly into an endless cycle of unrealistic expectations and failure.'

"Upon further review, the receiver did not establish a meaningful and personal relationship with the football, therefore it is ruled an incomplete pass."

"Oh, wait. He's on their side."

A football player accidentally kicks off the head of another football player.

"Let's do exactly what these pundits in the halftime report said we should do. If we lose, we'll blame them!"

'He hibernates between superbowls.'

At least Sunday is still a holy day.

'My turn! Kick me next!!'

Friendly fire!

'No slapping, Wilson! We don't start full-contact drills until tomorrow!'

"Sometimes I think all this post game analysis has gone too far."

Just sitting here kicking field goals (smiley face emoji)

Football

'Get the stretcher! He's got a mole on his leg that looks a little funky!!'

'Uh-oh ... Manning got hit hard, and he's not getting up.'

'Whoa! Don't try to be a hero. It's too late for Dan, but let this be a lesson...'

'Look up... Look down... Look at my thumb. Gee, You're...'

Super Bowl Sunday sermon: "Is it better to kick off or receive?"

Head Coach, Offensive Coordinator, Post-Touchdown Choreographer

"I take serious offense to their offense. And I am feeling very defensive about our defense. Would somebody give me a damn hug? Now Please?"

'Upon further review, the ruling on the field is upheld. The catch was totally constitutional. Touchdown!'

'We're a coalition force, ref.'