Touchdown Dancer Pillows

Head Coach, Offensive Coordinator, Post-Touchdown Choreographer

'...However, he is such a heck of a nice guy, we're going to give him the touchdown anyway.'

Input From The Front Office

'The Wilsons picked up a quarterback in the off-season. The Riveras picked up a quarterback. The Ludwigs picked up a quaterback...'

"Football is too dangerous, Junior. Why not follow my footsteps in a safe sport - chasing investment yield?"

American Football.

Punishment for the kicker.

Football.

'I've decided to skip my senior year and go directly into an endless cycle of unrealistic expectations and failure.'

'He's checking with his agent to see if it's okay to score a try!'

"I'll assume, then, my remarks have hit a responsive chord?"

"Oh, wait. He's on their side."

A football player accidentally kicks off the head of another football player.

"Let's do exactly what these pundits in the halftime report said we should do. If we lose, we'll blame them!"

'My turn! Kick me next!!'

At least Sunday is still a holy day.

'He hibernates between superbowls.'

Friendly fire!

'No slapping, Wilson! We don't start full-contact drills until tomorrow!'

"Sometimes I think all this post game analysis has gone too far."

Football

"A four-year, $60 million contract and he can't even do a decent end-zone dance!"

'Whoa! Don't try to be a hero. It's too late for Dan, but let this be a lesson...'

Just sitting here kicking field goals (smiley face emoji)

'Uh-oh ... Manning got hit hard, and he's not getting up.'

'Get the stretcher! He's got a mole on his leg that looks a little funky!!'

'Look up... Look down... Look at my thumb. Gee, You're...'

"I take serious offense to their offense. And I am feeling very defensive about our defense. Would somebody give me a damn hug? Now Please?"

'Upon further review, the ruling on the field is upheld. The catch was totally constitutional. Touchdown!'

'That was some hit!'