Topiary T-Shirts

"Well, that's created a little order in a world of chaos."

Gardener clipping topiary stairs

Three Circles of Gardener's Hell.

Topiary chicken lays an egg.

Maze.

Trimming the hedge.

A topiary doghouse

Never criticise his creative efforts...

'Smith, where exactly did you get your experience in 'Hedge Fund Management'?'

Hedgecutter cutting a hedge 'key' into a hedge 'door'

The dog wouldn't stand still

I Love Topiary

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

'The wheel was great, but what have you done for me lately?'

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

Pounding speeds up the computer.

'You forget, I'm a blackbelt in powerpoint.'

The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."

The Anti-Agent

"My email is down... talk to me."

"My granddaughter's first words to me were 'OK, Boomer.' I have no idea what that even means."

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

Lynching on social media

"Welcome to the future"

"My older self travels back just to remind me to put the cap back on this pen?"

"There's no such thing as 'bad publicity'." "All traffic is good traffic."

Robot Parts $5

'The check is in the email attachment.'

"This isn't exactly what I had in mind when I told you to go outside and play."

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

'I remember when you used to look for answers using your astute powers of deduction.'

In the Guru District

'My penmanship has really improved since I got a laser printer.'

"It's almost 5 o'clock! Where the hell is my vodka app?!"

"The good old days of eating the washing off the line are all gone methinks: The farmer has bought an electric dryer..."