Topiary Enthusiast T-Shirts

Topiary - Middle Finger

Topiary chicken lays an egg.

Trimming the hedge.

Topiary bushes in the form of pointing hands. People are looking in the directions that the fingers are pointing.

A Gardener's Self-Portrait

Hedge Car

"I trimmed our shade tree."

"Never talk your husband into doing the yard work when he'd rather be fishing."

I Love Topiary

"Well, that's created a little order in a world of chaos."

Gardener clipping topiary stairs

"Stop the drama. Take that wig off and wait 'till spring like everyone else."

Gardener Cutting Tree into 'Rock' Symbol.

'This guy loves giving stump speeches. Ironically, they're all against deforestation.'

"Can you tell the oak tree to tell the birch tree to tell the elm tree I said hi?"

It's estimated that millions of trees are planted by forgetful squirrels.

Do you have anything bigger?

"I brought cocoa."

D.I.Y

"The homes in this area are beautiful."

Stop and Birch

"Today, son, you are a man."

'... Of course it's expensive. It doesn't grow on trees you know!'

'It's only now that we've chopped down all of the trees that we can see the damage we've done'

'I Love the touch of your dry flakey skin!'

'Smith, where exactly did you get your experience in 'Hedge Fund Management'?'

Spring in Japan.

Tree Squirrel

"How do you know it's my leaves clogging the shower drain?"

"We have a new line of designer hedge funds...the Topiary Group."

Lumberjack Christmases.

"Looks like you both suffer from IBS. You...irritable bowel. Your friend...irritable burl."

No tree hugging.

"The best laid plans of mice and men... differ materially in their objectives."

"She's had a lot of work done."