Topiary Tosser T-Shirts

Man cutting hedge into shape of a woman.

"Well, that's created a little order in a world of chaos."

Gardener clipping topiary stairs

Gardener Cutting Tree into 'Rock' Symbol.

Geeks and their dogs.

'Smith, where exactly did you get your experience in 'Hedge Fund Management'?'

Trout Game

"I'll race you to the top."

"I just knew there had to be a better use for tomatoes than making boring old sandwiches."

"The judges aren't too impressed!"

"My Instagram feed is basically people, dog food and tennis balls."

"She's had a lot of work done."

Pizza Throwing

'Bone appetit!'

Hedge Car

A topiary doghouse

Maze.

Topiary bushes in the form of pointing hands. People are looking in the directions that the fingers are pointing.

'Wait! His toy mouse and his yummies!'

"In all my years of teaching I've never seen pizza dough spun into a triangle!"

The dog wouldn't stand still

Hedgecutter cutting a hedge 'key' into a hedge 'door'

Stonehedge

Topiary: helping nature look her best

Three Circles of Gardener's Hell.

Topiary By Numbers

A Gardener's Self-Portrait

"By making him retrieve the ball I'm teaching him the self-reliance he'll need every day at work."

Topiary chicken lays an egg.

Hedge trimming.

Never criticise his creative efforts...

Throwing Away Music

Topiary chair.

"You realize they won't know the difference."

I Love Topiary