Toothpaste Tube Wrangler Gifts

'For best results, squeeze from the bottom.'

Deliboys

Good Dentist ~ Bad Dentist

'This is our Greek debt, this is our Spanish debt, and this is our Portuguese debt...'

'Thanks, I just know that I'll never be able to repay your kindness . . .'

'I'm looking for a toothpaste that combats Tokyo, Kansas city and Suburban Portland along the gum line.'

"Yes, you did close some of your tabs. However, you still have 1,894 open. You're a tab hoarder."

But I followed the recipe exactly.

Toastquest!

"And there it is... Coronation chicken"

Student rakes leaveslaundry in dorm room.

'I guess I never should have quit the rodeo'

Adult Education Evening Class: How to sort your rubbish.

Christo's greatest challenge.

"If you won't brush or floss could you at least run your tongue over your teeth once in a while?"

'I've been here for 30 years. I've forgotten what my exact role is, but I do finally know how to fill out all the forms.'

Pork bellies 3 times a day...cookbook for the commodities investor.

'Nightmare on Form Street.'

Before baseball, raccooning enjoyed a brief stint as the national pastime.

Grabbed By Gorilla

Subway rider holds onto man's tie.

'Honey, I need the Drano again.'

"I'm still not sure whether you've offered me a job!"

This one rolls a smidgen better....

Nowadays most farming was farmed out - but there was still plenty of BS.

"You were supposed to take it to be repaired today."

"Sorry I'm late. I tripped over a laundry basket on my way to my computer."

"Gasp - new nicotine patch...new nicotine patch..."

In and out dustbins.

Gardening.

Death watches late night teeth infomercial.

"Ain't no feelin' like roundin' up free range ranges."

'Management think staff need to use their common sense more...and this is how we want them to use it!'

"Confirm or deny: while working at home you attempted to trap beaver. . . and skunk."

'Sorry, I've just pressed the wrong button.'