Tomato Lovers Gifts

I think we may have genetically overmodified the tomatoes.

'I guess there are lots of rotten jobs, Gramma...I hope I don't have to clean the taco hut forever.'

'But Mom, I like potatoes in their jackets.'

Menu Dating

Gramma's Tators & Gravy...All You Can Eat!

"Can you turn these mashed potatoes into french fries?"

Stupid Microwave

'Look, I know it's artificial orange, but you're sick, I say, sick.'

"When Ed suggested 5 potato, 6 potato, 7 potato more, I suggested a vasectomy."

"The chef ran out of the shiitake-infused sweet potato au gratin, so he substituted hash browns."

"I just explained 'kugel' to him."

"We're actually going to grow potatoes on Mars!"

'Tropical fruit, imported cheese, coconuts...I'm not really into that 'eat locally' stuff.'

'More toys! The way you kids spend, you must think bananas grow on trees.'

"Summer's here. Do you want to start talking incessantly about tomatoes or corn?"

The BLTR (the bacon, lettuce, tomato, revolution)

Dreaming Of Spring

'Be sure to ask George about his tomatoes.'

"If you're ever granted three wishes, don't blow them all on a giant body with tiny arms legs."

'Peel, Spot! Peel!'

I knew from the starch we were a perfect mash.

'With all the new laws being proposed, our tomatoes with founder genes may soon be an endangered species.'

"You have such beautiful eyes."

'Potatoes. How many would I need to make a bottle of vodka?'

'Bananas! Once you've skinned them and removed the bone, there's nothing left.'

"Are you sure this is the Irish guacamole?"

"I'd love to share these with you, but I'd never forgive myself if you got tooth decay."

'We haven't been seeing eye-to-eye lately.'

The Hypnotato,

Spud dating.

"I'm going to a concert by a really famous superstar....he deserves to be pelted with expensive organic tomatoes!"

'This is my wife Hilda, who is quite a tomato herself!'

'I can't believe it's not butter!'

Mash-test Dummies.

Potato Famine (somebody didn't make enough mashed potatoes)