Toilet Paper Tycoon Gifts

Toilet Paper Inheritance

"I think you're about to become very popular."

"I always buy toilet paper in bulk. My family shreds through it so quickly."

Toilet Tissue Typist.

Two 'superheros' show the discrepancy in toilet paper production.

"You are correct sir, I am only the janitor and you are the CEO, but remeber I control the availability of toilet paper in the executive washroom."

"Can I get paid in toilet paper squares?"

"The deal is $30K for a dozen rolls. First we count the cash - then you get to squish."

"Sorry lad, ye can't be having' me pot o' toilet paper."

There's a Facebook group for everyone... "Even Toilet Paper Mummies!"

Coronavirus: Consequences for the economy!

The contract was not worth the paper it was written on, which considering the paper was not a good sign.

I break for toilet paper

"After being shorted on his bonus, Earl the maintenance man decided to remove all the toilet paper from the executive washrooms."

"No not the puppy please"

'Toilet paper, Lassie! Fetch toilet paper! Stupid mutt!'

Have food. Need toilet paper

Do what you can to flatten the curve

A hand reaches frantically out a trailer bathroom door trying to grab a roll of toilet paper that's rolling away and down the aisle.

A new species just discovered in the Softwood Forest...The TP tree.

Creation of Adam

'If they don't want me drinking out of the toilet, what's this roll of napkins for?'

"Hi, Honey, I went to that new wholesale store...and, boy, did I get a deal on toilet paper!"

The Thinker Thinks of Toilet Roll.

'I see you approve of our switch to Ultra Soft.'

Flush Direct

"I can't come out, Mary is having one of her marathon cries."

Over. Under. Sideways. Kid.

"Cartonsit as a general rule, already work alone, usually at home."

'It was the only white thing I had.'

'You're so soft today. Did you switch to 2-ply?'

"Measure twice. Wipe once."

'It just hasn't been my day.'

'The newspaper reckons there's a shortage of toilet paper.' - 'What would we do without newspapers?'

"Watch your step, it's a sure sign bears are around."