Toddler Tumbler Gifts

'Mom! -- Jeffrey's having a wardrobe malfunction!'

Mother feeds messy child with extra long spoon.

'Sometimes I worry that I basically wasted my 2's.'

Swan Fairy Tales

"They’re baseballs. You throw ’em."

Little league world series of poker.

The No No No's

'Why can't we trade him to that lady for her two little girls?'

Doughboy Dad

'Mom! -- Jeffrey's having a wardrobe malfunction!'

Don't be surprised --- They always start out as quadrupeds.

Fat Kid 23- Catches a bogie

Stepping on clown's shoe...

Look at the size of that fork. She must be very hungry!

'Beware of teething baby.'

'Hey, Mom, here comes Frankie's tailor!'

"I'm going crazy staring at the same four legs."

"As it's your birthday, would you like to go in the Big Chair?"

Oh, sorry, it's in airplane mode.""

"I'd like me first word to be profound, but I'll probably panic and blurt out 'Mama' like every other baby."

'Row, row, row your boat, Gently down the stream...'

"No, I wasn't in a car accident. As a new parent, I'm still trying not to trip on all the toys on the floor."

"This is our most practical model. It comes with a 21-year warranty."

'Sorry, sweetie -- they're not that kind of cookies.'

Those missing socks...where do they go?

"Come back to bed. You know sleep deprivation lowers your sales resistance."

'Gee, Dad, Mom's getting better at this all the time!'

"I mean, he does have a point."

"I haven't been in a playpen yet that could hold me."

"I hope you remembered to bring something for the dog."

A pediatrician with children hanging off his arms

'Do these come in blue?'

"Before we start on the main agenda does anybody need money to take them to the tinkle room?"

"How is it you only remember the good times?"

Toddler in the Bed: A Journey