Toddler Tales Aficionado T-Shirts

'She has great communication skills.'

Fishing Tales

The Tale of the Tape of the Tail.

"When Mom reads that story, the dragon comes off as a much more sympathetic character."

"That's right kiddo, I'm one of the original band members of the Musicians of Bremen..."

Paul Bunyan gets the leg-lengthening Operation

'All this is nuthin! There was one yeaw up noth...when it snowed fah two yeaws! I had t'dig down ten feet t'haul in my lobstah traps.'

'Young Master and I are both turning two: How come I'm so much more mature than he is?'

Men reading Tall Stories, and Short Stories in a Library

"Yes, I was using my mobile whilst driving... I was calling the police to tell them I was chasing a gang of bank robbers!"

'The frog is deceased, Mr. Graham. You don't need malpractice insurance.'

"At long last, Wyatt, our dream has come true and we are within reach of the legendary toast fields of the Sierra Madre."

"Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs would make a great reality show."

A Salmon Lie

"Pecos Bildungsroman"

The Curious George pop-down book

Captain Eddie's New Boat:'The insurance company laughed last year when I insisted on adding Kraken coverage.'

'I know how you like things to be clean, so I gave fishy a bath!"

'Sure you always catch bigger fish than me. Your arms are a foot longer than mine.'

"Pop, tell me again how Jazz came up the river from New Orleans."

Library: Tall-Tales and Facts.

'He doesn't exaggerate, he just remembers big.'

'That's right kids: I jumped through rings of fire when I was with the Circus!'

'Well yes, son. I imagine some marriages of convenience took place.'

Three lanes at a turnpike; one for passes, one for cash and one, manned by a troll, for riddles.

"So I break free and I swear that hook was this big."

'He's lying about either a fish or his penis.'

Goodnight Moon

'I don't believe for one minute that an octopus crawled up last night and ate all the coconuts!'

A Tale of the Sea

"I must have hit 20 home runs!"

"In your original statement, you said the fish was much bigger."

"This is your great-great-uncle Enchilmo Ladas. We called him 'Enchi' for short."

'Women don't simply believe everything we hear, you know.' - 'But that does not stop you repeating it.'