Title Collectors Gifts

"Frederick II, King and Chief Executive Officer of Mondamia."

Welcome. National Association of People Padding their Resumes with National Associations. And I think you'll agree, our pointless seminars have some really great titles this year!

For years he had enjoyed the good life at the royal court, until one day, Prince Frederick of Norway pointed out that there was, in fact, no such title as the Grand Duke of Funkadelia.

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

"We don't call them 'horns' anymore. They're interactive audio crash deterrent stimulators."

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

'Instead of a raise, Yomp, you may call me 'Chief', instead of Mr Staghorn.'

"In my life, I've had seven cars, six jobs, five houses, four bypass operations, and three wives!"

At Ireland's oldst and most respected school of dance, Mrs O'Hara made a terrible discovery... (Book entitled 'The book of Irish dancing vol. 2 - How to incorporate the arms')

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

"Do you buy cars here?"

Divine Desk Bins

"I want to be straight with you, Cathy—I've gone through a number of cars in my life."

Kanya West Inspired Children Books.

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

'A is for Arse.'

"There are those who write books to be read and other who write novels for bookshelves."

'I chose my field on what would put the most impressive initials after my name.'

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

'You don't have the muscles to buy a muscle car, dear.'

'God's speed.'

'Once upon a time there was a really lousy editor name Sue. Sue was lazy and stupid, so she was fired, and her boss lived happily ever after. The end.'

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

"I have an app for that."

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

Memoirs: Fiction/Non Fiction.

'You shouldn't have.'

"I got my PhD in Nursing just so people would have to call me Doctor."

'I'm afraid you'll have to buy a car, sir -- Braxton, here, accidentally sold your car to somebody else.'

'Mom, dad's toasting the new year with the car again!'

Home Sweet Second Home.

The Boss.

Benjamin Bunny re-writes Beatrix Potter

You trip on it, you buy it.