Titanic Centenary Gifts

'Your iceberg salad, Captain!'

'It appears he hit an iceberg.' (A LETTUCE)

man fishing at a dock sees a billboard: Do You Know It's Anniversary

Authorization for the Use of Farce

An old man and women are driving along with a 'Still married' sign on their car.

"...but, seriously..."

Clown Inhaling Laughing Gas

Titanic iceberg auction

It's obvious anniversaries are the lynchpin of the big oil conspiracy. What? Husbands forget them. Which leads to wives pummeling them. Which leads to men making sure they don't forget again. All you had to do was mark it in your calendar! What do you think pens are made of? Pummeling will now commence.

'What I need now is a good publicist...'

Wife asking husband what resolutions he is going to make for the new century

Perhaps a ceasefire is in order. Terms? I will agree not to pummel you for forgetting our anniversary. You will refrain from pursuing the possibility that I, too, have forgotten it. You will, furthermore, massage my feet in penance for denying me a reason to yell at you. Non-negotiable! Got off easy.

"He said his goal was to make it to 100."

"And they all said, twenty five years ago, that our trial seperation wouldn't last!!"

"Most of the time, war...it makes no sense. A lot of times, we'd hear artillery whistling over our heads. But really, you can't move. You just wait...and wait...until it hits...and hope it isn't hitting you."

'He's disappointed with the Queen's card - he wanted a rude one!'

Clown uses skirting flower to prevent hot foot

'Since we've been married thirty years, Lester, I think it's time to face up to the fact that we've been seeing too much of each other.'

Proxy War Redux

The y2k bug being chased by the JFK bug

Happy Anniversary!

"This is where the party budget ran out."

'We got married on Cup Final Day so that he wouldn't forget our anniversary.'

'I can sense you're upset Darling: Did I miss our anniversary again?'

'I bet you thought I'd forgotten our anniversary.'

"The 10th anniversary gift is tin. I got Ralph a new tinfoil hat. He's more sedate with the extra channels."

'My, doesn't time fly? I can hardly believe it's been a year since you last forgot our anniversary!'

'This is such an appropriate way for us to celebrate our GOLDEN wedding anniversary."

For our 25th anniversary, I think we should renew our vow not to kill each other.

60 years of the Treaty of Rome

'No, the word I used was 'unthinkable'...'

'You remembered our anniversary!'

"I can't believe we've been married for 10 years and you never told me you had another leg!"

In his inimitable way, Carl quickly sucks the romance out of his and Diane's 15th anniversary dinner.

'I guess a facial hair removal kit isn't a good anniversary present.'