Tissue Hoarder Gifts

'I hate chick flicks!' 'Sniff...me too...'

AA Meeting Here Today

"Of course it's alien abductions! How else would you explain the, 'November Phenomenon'?"

'Being stuck on a desert island is one thing, but being struck on a desert island with a hoarder...'

The trap

"There is a great deal of evidence that big savings can be made if departments shared resources... But I suspect that implementing the changes might be problematic if we can't even get Norman to lend out his pencil sharpener."

"Yes Sir, we have secret storage locations all over the forest, so we can safely manage your favourite bone and toy..."

"I thought I'd be quids-in but I can't shift the bloody stuff."

"It's the dog."

"You're still burying your bones? I store mine in the cloud now."

"Which one of these things is the soap?"

"My father said I was too big for my britches!"

"Buckle up. We're in the midst of an unprecedented breadcrumb recession."

Time to put away your presents. I don't have room. You said you "needed" a new jacket. I do! My old one's too small. Donate it. I would. But I can't get it out of my closet.

"This is where I keep my entire music collection."

'Pay bills, stick to a budget, plan ahead.'

Music Collector.

"Your tests are back. You're allergic to tissues."

"Enjoy the movie, and try not to cry too loud at the end when the dog comes home."

"There's so much evidence we should put some aside for a different case."

Asthma cats

A man realises he is out of toilet paper.

"...so you then developed an addiction to buying toilet rolls. Wasn't that rather expensive?"

"I've got an extremely rare Dusty Springfield."

"I save all my old computers, monitors and devices. I have a hard time letting go."

Santa with a bag of toys and a bag of batteries for toys.

"Clear off! Can't you see I'm self-isolating?"

Toilet Roll Drop

"She's always got her nose in a book."

Coronavirus Shortages

I should have measured my garden before going to the garden center...

"Hello. . . Police? We've been burgled! The bastards have taken all of our soap, hand sanitiser and toilet rolls!"

A barrage of CDs.

Cow-sized Tissues.

The Common Cold.