Tiny Toilet Paper Collection Specialist Pillows

'And he's so picky about what brand of tiny toilet paper he'll use. It would be much easier if we could just train him to use the litter box like the rest of us!'

"Sorry lad, ye can't be having' me pot o' toilet paper."

His Hers Pers Vis Xyrs Hirs TBD

Coronavirus: Consequences for the economy!

The trap

I break for toilet paper

"After being shorted on his bonus, Earl the maintenance man decided to remove all the toilet paper from the executive washrooms."

"I thought I'd be quids-in but I can't shift the bloody stuff."

'Toilet paper, Lassie! Fetch toilet paper! Stupid mutt!'

"No not the puppy please"

Do what you can to flatten the curve

A hand reaches frantically out a trailer bathroom door trying to grab a roll of toilet paper that's rolling away and down the aisle.

A new species just discovered in the Softwood Forest...The TP tree.

Creation of Adam

"Hi, Honey, I went to that new wholesale store...and, boy, did I get a deal on toilet paper!"

"I can't come out, Mary is having one of her marathon cries."

Flush Direct

"Cartonsit as a general rule, already work alone, usually at home."

'What training do I get?'

'It was the only white thing I had.'

'You're so soft today. Did you switch to 2-ply?'

'It just hasn't been my day.'

"I figured my family could use a padded cell. Actually, I just buy toilet paper in bulk."

"...so you then developed an addiction to buying toilet rolls. Wasn't that rather expensive?"

Toilet paper calendar

"Measure twice. Wipe once."

"Watch your step, it's a sure sign bears are around."

"Here, try this on." "But mom, everyone's wearing three ply. I'll be a freak."

A man realises he is out of toilet paper.

"Oh, thank God!"

'Procter and Gamble? I dunno, sounds risky - what if everyone stops using toilet paper?'