Timeless Tale Buff Gifts

'It's my latest novel, 'Hard Times' part 2.'

'Br'er Fox said 'I'm going to throw you into the briar patch'...And Br'er Rabbit said, 'Please,please don't taser me!''

'That's not really what I meant by 'let your hair down', Rapunzel.'

Don Quixote

Falstaff

Alice in Wonderland: The Queen Turns into a Pack of Cards.

'Ignore it! It's just some of the local kids trying to get in for free.'

Alice Through the Looking Glass - Alice Climbs Through The Mirror.

'Come on Jill, they say the water's well good.'

Alice in Wonderland: Alice and the Dodo.

Pun on Excalibur - Swiss Army knife appears from the lake.

Modern History: Last Year/Last Month/Last Week/Yesterday.

"Why do you automatically assume that I'll fly too close to the sun?"

"Well, I just experienced my first misophoia trigger."

"When the evil witch pushes the children into the oven, .... that's just a metaphor for putting them in the microwave"

"It was a cold night, like tonight, back, I'd say, in 1954."

Frank and Ernest Updated Fairy Tales. Do you mean fair like "pretty" or fair like "evenhanded"?

Goldilocks reads note from three bears: Gone for a walk in the woods. Your porridge is on the table.

'Just think of me as your life coach.'

Robin Hood.

Polly Rescues the Charitable Grinder

Sadly, Rapunzel didn't account for the Prince's weight.

"They were all so good at the auditions, that I couldn't pick just seven."

Ugly sisters

Adam chasing Eve with a leaf blower.

The Windmill Gets Attacked (Don Quixote).

' Look at these yolk stains.I figure he was killed here,then dragged out to the wall to make it look like an accident.'

Alice in Wonderland - The Gryphon.

'I walked 5 miles to school and on top of that, there were no vasectomies. In my day you got neutered!'

"Alexa, Alexa on the wall..."

"I'm sorry, Rhett, but now I don't give a damn."

Don Quixote Update.

Three wise men on a medal podium.

I know, right? People who go by one name are so pretentious.

Slow Day In The Garden Of Eden.