Time-travelling Commentator Gifts

Caveman sees comment section below cave drawings,

Physician tending a mummy.

Cord cutter

"The regular Fox news commentator was canned for being too soft on Iran. I'm Dick Cheney."

Ideas Ahead of their Time

"Legs together, David -- You're hamspreading again."

Ants dressed as businessmen going to work.

"Still, he might be remembered as the 'no cloning' President."

'I'm terribly worried, Doctor - he doesn't talk back to Bill O'Reilly any more.'

"At our age I'd say we have about two or three binge watches left in us."

IMHOtep

"Really! A firecracker! Test his nerves! Where do you come up with these stupid ideas?"

'Ã…w, gee whiz, Mom -- all the other kids have velociraptors!'

Pundits

"You'll get over him."

"You can count on my unloading the dishwasher in any number of alternate timelines. Now whether it occurs in this one..."

Garg saw the future, but didn't quite know what to do with it.

"It's a leap year, so an extra week's added to the calendar."

"Richelieu, Voltaire, Napoleon...no wonder you know so much about these people. I'm sure you met them personally!"

"Yes, it's half past two - is that all?"

'And now, an NBS News Special Investigative Report: Why doesn't President Obama get the respect and support he deserves?'

First Speeding Fine.

Time traveller of the year, 3173, A.D.

"Google says it's some form of ancient timing device."

'That's the end of the news - (B****RD MEN!!)'

"Tonight's big story... we're leaving you... it's not you, it's us..."

"Believe me, nobody's going to care you had facial hair a hundred million years from today."

"....And here we are in one of the older parts of the city..."

Sand Of Time

"...No, he can't really fly...no, the bad guys really don't have a ray gun...no, this cereal really isn't the best food in the whole world...no, it won't make you as strong as a giant..."

"Drat! A flat tyre. . ."

"This just in! A fifteen-man nineteen-forties swing-era-style big band was discovered intact today in Brno, Czechoslovakia."