Time-travel Storyteller Gifts

Danae's Prescient Auto-Biography: '...It's my factual account of what my life will be, and I'm going to copy Mark Twain's marketing genius by holding it from publication for 100 years!'

"Let's just say I have a pre-existing condition."

'What zip code are we in now?'

"Meet the scribe"

"I don't care about the rating on Goodreads. We're reading Cinderella!"

Historical memory is on life support.

'That's about it so far, Son.'

If time travel was invented in 1600 in England. I'm a fan of the bard. Let's see if he wants to take a journey through time. Globe Theater. Sounds fun! Let's go to 2020. It's a nice round number. Zazzz! Poof! That's weird. How did they know he was coming? And why does he need to leave this place? Apparently you can't be here, William. The sign says "No Shakespeare in the park this summer."

"So then, after I'd invented my time machine, I thought: why not go back and visit the good old days?"

The Missing Sock Returns

"We're following Carrot Top."

'Hold on, I'll get the camera.'

Second hand furniture.

E=mc2.

Pinocchio's Second Realization

"Desmond likes to live in the moment. . . and that moment happens to be 1960."

Einstein develops his theories that time is relative while ordering at a fast food restaurant.

"Please! No harmonizing during ululations!"

"About how if the dark ages never happened we'd be so much more technologically advanced by now."

Ideas Ahead of their Time

Time Machine Collision

"Wait... what was it I came up here for?"

"Early model of baggage claim"

"Damn. I took the Rip Van Nyquil."

'I'd say it's six of one and one half doxen of the other.'

Time for vacation, time for work.

'You know what they say - 'Those who don't learn the lessons of history are doomed to go to summer school.''

"I'm going to prove that Math comes in handy later in life."

Danger Slow Sand.

Cash Machines From Across the Land

"More quarters! For God's sake, more quarters!!"

"I don't know who you are!"

"It seems like only yesterday that Dad told me I'll be an adult before I know it."

'This new game isn't working out -- the ball keeps running away.'

'I used to spring forward. Now all I can do is fall back.'