Time Off Request Gifts

"I know it's a crucial time for the company, sir, but I've got to go down to the sea again."

Very Difficult Conversations

"Hiring someone to replace me and then expecting me to train him just doesn't sit well with me."

"You're a great team player - so we're trading you."

Temporarily Unavailable

"Wow - Heavy, man"

'It's my own fault. I never upgraded my skills. I was replaced by a man half my age with a more advanced smartphone and hundreds of productive apps.'

Earl suspends his disbelief.

"We're looking for someone who'll be available twenty four-seven."

'Never roll your eyes while the boss is talking.'

'I'm working through the Summer as usual: I take my annual leave in Winter you see...'

"He's highly qualified to be our new associate pastor but he wants all weekends and holidays off - the same days I want off."

'Wait a minute! This is supposed to be my day off!'

'I discovered just as much work gets done when you're not there.'

'I'm afraid we have to let you go. As you know, you're entitled to a 'Golden Handshake'...

'There's new evidence that my departure from my previous employer merely coincided with their brain drain.'

Planned service changes

You're Employment has been terminated -Smiley face lol

'I need a Vacation.'

'I'm sorry I didn't come to work yesterday, sir -- somehow, it seemed like Sunday.'

"I gave you the axe. How dare you come back and use it to intimidate me."

"Don't forget to torch the place when you leave."

Workaholic Ned Fulgum takes his first day off in over fifty-seven years.

"You can't take off from work to go fishing unless you take me with you."

Chillaxing!

"They told me my parachute would be golden. Turns out it's pyrite."

"I've got to be honest. It's going to be hard to find you a position that offers 40 days of personal time."

'Relax, I'm not here for you. Just for your job.'

'We really can't afford golden parachutes any more, but here's a plastic crash helmet.'

"But I was told this was included in my severance package."

'OK everyone get out... we're downsizing!'

"Guys, I can't afford to be laid off."

"I'm not good at confrontation, so unscramble this phrase in your head for a surprise message."

'You get 104 personal day. They're called Saturdays and Sundays.'

"You're fired."