Timber Tamer T-Shirts

Man with fake trunk to help him lift timber

"Lovely dovetail."

'Let the creepy crawly hunt begin!'

Mechanic looking under the hood of a car.

'I think we'd be more confident about meeting our targets if we could work out what they were!'

'The hair specialist is down the hall.'

He has his own peculiar problems whether casting from the beach or from a boat.

Gardener's Calendar: Try to put the other things back...

New Swiss Army Knife

Timber preservation

Beware of the Undergrowth.

"Slide, Howie!!! Slide!"

"I wish he'd slow the hell down." "I wish he'd hurry the hell up."

"Wait, I've got sand in my shoe."

"Most projects require three hands."

'It's an emergency! The sitter wants to know where Marmaduke's doggie treats are!'

He collects a wide range of tackle and knows precisely how to use it.

"You forgot to adjust your hilling discs again, didn't you?"

'Do your thing, Phil...lull them into submission.'

Golf Hil Divot

"Does it have a chapter on using the phone to call someone who can do it right?"

Using plant pots to reach inaccessible object

Dave had yet to master his new nail machine gun.

"I have a high tolerance for tedium."

"My turn."

Superhero training.

"Because we're jerks."

'His name is Ralph, but he'll only come to you if you shout 'biscuit'.'

Scrapyard Worker

"Just take the crowd out of it. Imagine everyone is naked."

Machine, be good to me this year. Or else, I'm sticking you under the bed again.

"Darling, size is not important!"