Tie Hater Pillows

Man burning his tie.

"1-1"

"It's not the first time he'd been warned about wearing a long tie when leaning over the shredder."

'This is our bestselling power tie. Just put it on and clap twice.'

"The boss is charging. I knew you shouldn't have worn that red tie."

"Gift"

"On this team we take off our jackets,but we don't loosen our ties."

Tie Rolls

'You don't want the job, do you?'

'The latest market research shows that men's neckware width is the most accurate indicator of market fluctuations.'

'Oh good! - I hate long lines!'

Fred's Tie: A Momentary Lapse of Judgement or A Cry For Help?

"If the headline screams catastrophe, but nobody cares to read it, does it still make a sound?"

"I've got something to tell you,Dad-I don't like fish...I mean I REALLY don't like fish...I HATE fish,Dad-there,I've said it now."

'Johnny, personal feelings like loud neckties and long jokes; best left at home.'

"I see we're split between those who like my new tie, and those who welcome unemployment."

"Then it's agreed, my tie is prettier than Henderson's."

Friendly Tie

Tie-Land.

A genie helps a man fold laundry.

' This is our 'casual dress day'. For the rest of the week they make us wear tuxedos ! '

'My power ties are demanding more closet space.'

"At Hooters I'd already have three compliments on my tie!"

'The only exercise I believe in is the exercise of power.'

'Hornsby, you're fired. Incidentally, I like your tie.'

The first birthday gift.

"Think of it -- you'd never have to fold another shirt."

'I just faxed my tie to our Des Moines office.'

"Hold on a minute, will you? I just want to see what color Charlie Rose's tie is tonight."

'I know we're not supposed to wear them, but I got it for Father's Day.'