Thunderbolt Tosser Gifts

The gods drink beer while Zeus throws a thunderbolt.

"I work out in preparation for being out of shape for the next 30 years."

"(Huff) Here's (huff) your (huff) tea (huff... huff... huff... huff...)" "I will almost certainly regret asking you this, but what on earth are you doing, you cretin?" "All (huff) across America, (huff) office workers are ditching (huff) their desks and walking (huff) on treadmills while they work." "Can I get some water?" "Coming right up." "Good thing I wore my tripping shoes."

'What, you afraid of a little exercise?'

Trout Game

"How's my wife doing in the discus tryouts? I can tell you that, at home, she's hell on wheels with saucers and plates."

"I just knew there had to be a better use for tomatoes than making boring old sandwiches."

Musical Fight

"The judges aren't too impressed!"

'Bone appetit!'

'Take it from someone with experience. . . you can't go throwing tantrums until you've at least tossed a few.'

"In all my years of teaching I've never seen pizza dough spun into a triangle!"

'Wait! His toy mouse and his yummies!'

Exercise rat race

'Come on! haven't you anything else to do?' 'There's always darts'

'If she's that upset about the football match we're playing in this afternoon, what's she going to be like when she hears about the darts match this evening?'

'Her special Talent is sulking.'

'I've gone over the fight tapes and I think I've pinpointed your weakness.'

Acupuncture darts.

Before Pillows.

Tantrum sex.

'Wow, Frank - he nailed it!'

'Be honest Fred - you've had enough.'

"You realize they won't know the difference."

'Coming through!'

Leek club darts match.

Le javelot pour bûcheron.

"It's right there in black and white, break two, win a prize."

"Mr. Zeus! What are you doing out of bed? After your operation, the doctor said you shouldn't even be shorting out lamps..."

Poison Dart Training Camp.

'Ooo...this can't be good.'

'Son, I'll put your treehouse back when the deer season is over.'

'One hundred and eighty !'