Throne Collector T-Shirts

"In high school, I was quite the star in metal shop."

"Ironically, this is the living room."

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

'A portcullis is SO yesterday!'

The Victors

Dog Hunting Trophies.

The one that got away

"Really? They're now giving out non-participation trophies?"

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

'This vacation, let's go on something OTHER than a power trip.'

Award Winning Gardener

Neptune

"... and what’s even worse – I spilled my beer!"

"It is we."

"It isn't much of a dragon, but then, she wasn't much of a maiden."

Dad Trophies

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

Win - win

'Guess what? I won again.'

Spaceman looking out of the window of his spaceship at planets.

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

'Small favor, Elizabeth - before we enter the throne room, drop back ten paces.'

Pinata Trophies

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

"Want to find out if you're also king of the swamp?"

'He followed me home, Dad -- can I oppress him?'

"Lord Stanley's Cup...and Bailey"

'What makes you think I want a trophy wife?'

First Prize!

'And now I'd like to name this month's recipient of the Dumbest Global E-mail Award...'

'I finished last, but I was the only one who passed the drug test.'

"Happy Birthday - I saw this and thought of you."