Thoughtful Techies Gifts

The relatively low impact of the e-piphany

Polly txt speak

"Technology isn't making me smarter. It's allowing me to be dumb, faster."

"...and before you embark upon life's journey, could one of you help me with my laptop?"

'A computer is only as good as the people who are employed to replace the people who were made redundant by the computer.'

Mouse in a hamster wheel.

"I'm trying to Google what I was thinking about twenty minutes ago!"

"I change my mantra every two months so no one can hack my soul."

'And the best thing about this electric thermal underwear is, no batteries, it's solar!'

'In the computer simulation he said he admired my candor and gave me a raise.'

"Maybe you set it up wrong."

"I couldn't find the phone charger, but I was able to locate all the mouses the kids lost over the years."

'This software package can cut your workload in half. Do you want to purchase two copies?'

"Hiya, Beautiful! What's your access code?"

"Dad's at that awkward age when he knows just enough about computers to really screw 'em up!"

"Siri, are Charlie’s parents to blame for his neurosis?"

'I've run your letter through the word processor several times, sir, but it just keeps getting worse.'

Innovate or die.

The Thinker (with a laptop).

"If the jumper cables don't work, I'll pour more motor oil on the keys."

Psychology Clinic. Most potent example of solipsism I've ever seen --- he follows himself on Twitter.

'Help me, sir... I want to save my last sip of lemonade, but it doesn't work!'

"Pull over, Rudolph! We'll have to charge the electric sleigh again..."

Websiteless -- please help.

Master Artists' Computer Graphics: Rodin's 'The Computer.'

'Ask about our daily sermon by fax plan.'

Receiving the early-morning T-mail.

"To return to normal height professor, we simply: 1. Switch on The Nano-Ray. 2. Find the Plug; 3. Insert it..."

Binary Meditation.

Cybernetics Research Lab.

"This is it? No video?"

"The meaning of life! Have you tried Googling it?"

"It used to be that if you worried about unseen forces you were considered paranoid. Now you're a security expert."

"AI can now scan dating sites and find your best match."

Shavuot - Like!