Mindful Techie Gifts

'Just when you think you've reached the final awareness, they send another update.'

"No, this does not count as screen time."

www.meditation.commm

"I just can't seem to turn the Wi-Fi off."

"The alarm will alert us when our meditative, present-moment-restoring tech break has ended."

Binary Meditation.

"I change my mantra every two months so no one can hack my soul."

"Technology isn't making me smarter. It's allowing me to be dumb, faster."

"Live in the sunshine, swim in the sea, drink in the wild air." — Ralph Waldo Emerson "Catch tennis balls in the mouth." — Me

"I have a recurring nightmare that I've taken a test, and the professor won't give me an 'A'."

I want a calendar where every day says here and now

"Lately, I've been trying to spend less time staring at the glowing orb."

"Slowly begin to reawaken the body with thoughts of unread E-mails, piles of dirty laundry, and the kids you have to pick up from school."

Go ahead and dissect me

'I was trying to extinguish my ego, and I got an Out of Memory Error.'

The power of the brain

2 + 2 = 4. 2 x 2 = 4. Oh, I get it! It's a Zen thing!

'I don't know why Doc, but my life is really upside down...'

"Don’t think of that tennis ball as lost. Think of it as finally free."

'I'm beginning to think outside the box again - get my GP quickly!'

"You are responsible for editing your thoughts. I'm just here to audit them."

First O.M.G. church.

'Ask about our daily sermon by fax plan.'

'Your problems are caused by all-or- nothing thinking. It's either that, or you don't have any problems.'

'I always answer their questions with a question - it drives them nuts!'

"I worry that some people find me boring"

You Have 1 New Messages

Holy phone

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with worrying that you forget something."

Internal Prisons

"The unexamined life is not worth living." Socrates. For dogs maybe, but not for cats.

"People can bridge the great distance between the Earth and the Moon..."

"Hmmm?!"

"And the weird shall inherit the Earth, for their ways are difficult for A.I. algorithms to figure out."

"O.K., God – please delete everything I said today."