Thesis Maestro Gifts

"Working on your M.Ed. thesis when you should be teaching is not closing the research-classroom gap."

'I'm sorry but I'm afraid the corporation is going in a different direction.'

There's no such thing as a triple carburetor bypass!

'He was only reaching for his powerpoint presentation pointer.'

'Lion Tamer experience hey? Well, I have a project currently needing your management skills...'

'Ms Simpson, I believe I've finally done it. I've written the Great American Memo.'

'I'm going to practice on you before I start managing other people.'

"I guess someone got up on the wrong side of the podium today."

He then drew a number of smaller pie charts behind the bigger chart. That helped to put it into perspective.

"You need to take the weak parts of your presentation and work them into something that won't get you fired."

Although not felt by everone, Wanda's powrful jargon sent seismic shock waves through some of the more geologically unstable department in the organization.

"You're writing a memoir? You're seven years old. Do you honestly think you can capture the interest of readers with such a short—wait, is that my name?!"

1 Only Smart Hammer Instructions

'It's good of you to go out of your way to show me what not to do, Mum.'

'A few messages came in during your lunch break.'

Editor.

'Who wants the talking stick?'

Traffic Management Strategic Group

'And this is after the creation of a Special Effects Department.'

'What do you mean, the chart resembles an iceberg?'

"Lucky Guess."

Project Manager Showdown

"Well, here's your problem. You need an O right there."

Hats: Management/Good Job/Friendly but Aloof.

'He was always too busy to sit for his portrait.'

"Your book stinks—we want to publish it."

"well I'll be - you are the boss of me."

'My computer? - I got rid of it for insubordination!'

The central metaphor of her novel was a fly.

IRS tax instructions.

'Your new book is full of mistakes: the critics will have a field day.'

"Get me someone in Apologies, someone in Walkbacks, and send up the whole Scapegoating team."

'Look on it as... constructive criticism.'

"Your first job is to learn to recognize your boss' voice on the phone."