Therapy Insights Fan Gifts

"Say these things, don't think them!"

"Trust me. This is going to make it easier to discuss your childhood."

DIY marriage counseling.

"Now, let’s talk about your attachment issues."

Relationship Rating: His and Hers

"This week we're going to try some regression therapy."

"It's my 30-day chip. One month catnip free."

"I'm sorry, sir, but we're not MAGICIANS!"

'We need to try to regress you beyond the last seven seconds...'

"You dumb clod! Do you realize you're almost two minutes late?"

"Have you tried sitting in a box?"

Laughter Therapy.

'I have an expense account, but it's a joke.'

Therapy for the cow dependent

'The therapy did help your husband find his inner child, unfortunately his inner child is called Dwayne.'

"How do you feel about turning over?"

"With the redundancy and the divorce I'm struggling to remain Mr. Happy."

Dentist as psychoanalyst with tooth patient on couch

'Extreme acupuncture.'

'I keep having these flashbacks.'

"Let's just get through the first aisle...then we'll discuss your impulse buying."

"I wouldn't worry about it, in your case, the superiority complex just goes with this territory."

'Dr Freud, this isn't comfortable. Why don't you sit on that chair?' 'That's not a bad idea.'

'I don't know what it is, doc. I think I'm having a nervous breakdown.'

'The part I like best about sex is when I light a cigarette and say next.'

Men and Women's changing rooms

Soccer Ball - "I'm sick and tired of being kicked around all the time."

'Spending and consuming - that's my kind of patriotism.'

"Try taking baby steps."

'...And when I asked my parents if I was adopted, they said 'not yet.''