Therapy Couch Surfers Gifts

"If you won't help me validate myself, will you at least validate my parking?"

Low-Energy Drinks

Excess Baggage: Fans of 'Deregulation' and the 'Free Market' probably have not had to buy a plane ticket recently.

"Lazy? I've been social-networking my ass off."

'Breaking Bad' Box Set Addiction.

"Am I sensing fear?"

"Forget the harps, we can spend Eternity in there."

"Stop blaming yourself. You loved, and dedicated so much of your time. Have you considered getting another cactus?"

Binge Watch

'Are you just back from work or on your way to the office?'

"Oh, goody. More reality-based crap."

'Ah, business as usual.'

It's only a remote, dear...if you want better programs you will need a wand.

"Today let's work on changing channels, drinking with a mouthful of food, and yelling at the TV all at the same time."

Psychiatrist with bust of Freud

"Well, do you want to buy this sofa or not? You've been on it for three days!"

Run, Mike, Run!

"I have no feelings about having no feelings."

Help! I've fallen in love and I can't get up! Cat alert system.

'Dear, the good doctor appears to have misplaced my file. Can you fax over your copy?'

'My mother was a real bitch!'

'I've lost the urge to repeat everything...'

"I don’t know … there’s a small part of me that just wants to erase my childhood."

"You just said, ‘And then I killed my first and second husbands.’ ... Let's explore that."

Let's try something new, Al. I'll say a word, then you remain mercifully silent for the rest of the hour.

'I always seem to bring out the worst in people.'

Watchdog

"These days, I'm mostly just legislating from the couch."

"Would it be possible to speak with the personality that pays the bills."

Edna's Couch and Breakfast.

'I think Mr. Teddy's getting too dependent on me.'

'World Cup? Nobody told me there was a football match on!'

I always felt I should have been born into royalty, Doctor Kapuchnik. If it's any consolation, Al, you're a royal pain.

'Dr Freud, this isn't comfortable. Why don't you sit on that chair?' 'That's not a bad idea.'

World Cup reactions