Theory Nerd Gifts

Max Weber

'The wheel was great, but what have you done for me lately?'

The Computer Bore

Striving to reduce our dependence on fossil fuels, scientists attempt to harness the energy of a toddler's tantrum.

"You do realize I'm going to have to bill you for ten?"

Ascent of Machine.

Pi Ala Mode.

Ahem. I'm eating. Not now, please. Just one tiny question. Believers I American exceptionalism have always said we're the paragon of democracy. So I'm just wondering … How come one party is passing unnecessary laws that'll keep millions of us from voting? They're robbing us of our voice! Could've surprised me.

"With less ice these days this provides better camouflage."

Conflating Science and Grammar. The boy threw the ball. What grammatical role does "ball" play in this sentence? An object in motion!

The Age of Reptiles. . .

"The low-res JPEG of Dorian Gray"

'If your calculations are correct, this completely revolutionizes everything we thought we knew about why chalk squeaks on a blackboard!'

"Space is curved and time is relative? Yeah, OK...I'm calling you a cab right now, buddy."

'...so if we can save enough maybe, just maybe, next year we'll be migrating courtesy of British Airways.'

Save the whales. . . Save the pandas. . . Save the planet.

'The recession is over, again.'

Neil Armstrong Outtakes

Pregnant Panda at Edinburgh Zoo: 'Congratulations, Wilkinshaw...'

Robot Grabber Arcade Game Machine

The real reason why flamingos are pink

"Well, I'm studying mathematics and I'm sure that's tougher than math."

'If only Darwin could have seen this.'

"I'm afraid you need knee surgery."

Vaccine

'I would love to be more energetic, but there is nothing I can do: It's a genetic condition...'

'Okay, I see it now...lame in the third hind leg on the left side!'

A Freudian slip...

Cliff Notes

Why giraffes hate winter

"You looked a lot bigger on your dating profile."

"I get the strange feeling this has happened before."

"Nasty sunburn."

Women's sportswear - Sale on paradigm shifts.

'What do you mean 'theoretically'? Everything we do is theoretical.'