Theatrical Communicator Pillows

"Can you just once get to the damn point without the usual embellishments?"

"He can't stop digressing."

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

Hey, calm down --- Now, what did you say again?

The writer: something who devotes a lifetime of solitude to the same of communication.

'Complete sentences?? Jeez, how verbose can you get?'

"Go ahead. Press one for more options."

Ninedency: A budding tendency

Direct Marketing...

"My Blackberry will get in touch with your Blackberry."

Target your message

Woman on the phone.

I'm not sure which, but he's just invented either writing or vandalism. (Published originally on Feb. 11, 2011.)

"Mom, come quick. Dad's in a stupor."

Wordplay: Export.

'I sort of thought your presentation was going to be in powerpoint.'

"Go on, say it again, 'I love you' in Armadillo."

"Abbreviations here, abbreviations there, and one is more incomprehensible than the next!"

Teacher getting the childrens attention by pretending to be on television.

You can't fool all of the people all of the time, especially with our advertising budget.

"I've learned to give up when I hear Brooklyn in your voice."

Give way - 'Oh, alright then...'

"I think I know what your problem is. Not enough PR."

By teaching the parrot a few key phrases, Marilyn no longer needs to nag her kids.

'Of course, this social contract will have to remain hypothical until someone invents writing.'

"See! Thousands of new listeners."

'Charles is a linguist. He speaks three language...golf, baseball and football.'

"I'm not great at communication, but my little buddy is."

Person talks on phone as other blogs.

"I appreciate succinct memos, Phillips, but stop writing them all in Haiku!"

'Actually, when I asked you to bring something fresh to the table, I was talking about ideas!'

'I'm dropping you a lion.'

'That line means good managerial skills!'

The Curse of Rhadamanthus (For Pete's Sake)

"I'm just posting something to my wall."