Theater Of The Absurd Fan Gifts

Iran bars two UN nuclear inspectors for 'untruthful reporting'

"I thought we agreed you weren't going to work at home."

"He was a sea rescue."

Race track - with the race being to apply the white lines between lanes

Pastry Hat

'I'd like two pizzas, one with cheese and pepperoni and the other with cheese and sausage. One more thing, do you deliver?'

'Can I call you back, Frank? A giant maggot is eating my desk, people are shooting at me and my hair is on fire.'

"...I don't believe in the past or the future. I don't even believe in right now. Everyone remembers the past differently. Everyone imagines the future differently. Everyone even disagrees about what's happening right now. So who's to say tomorrow what you and I did tonight?"

'Amount of white out used while writing, Moby Dick, an issue of The National Enquirer, and 101 Uses for a Dead Cat.'

'Because the horned one commands them to, that's how!'

"What are you talking about? We don’t even have a toilet seat!"

It was a pretty vicious attack. He's lost a lot of candy.

"It's a narrative I didn't intend."

'Upon further review, the pig did not have control of the ball prior to being eaten...'

UFO and snowman

"The first thing we have to do is get you up there."

'If only you could do this with a cow once in a week, we'd save a lot of money for the food delivery service, Rupert!'

Baseball.

'Miss Jones, take this down.'

'Keep it under you hat, but I want you to enrich some uranium.'

"At last! - A text from Godot!!"

Salome on Settle (also called Maitresse d'Orchestre) - intended for book but suppressed

The International Airline Basketball Tournament

'Bad as this may look, it's actually the perfect accompaniment with your entree.'

Franz Kafka does stand-up...

Nun fight at the OK Corral.

'Ok, now if everyone could just hold still.'

The Hypnotato,

"Sorry, Jeff. This just isn't working as I'd hoped."

''Tough crowd in tonight!''

The Bonvoy Age...

"Is really wet, here!"

Chick Billiard Ball

Magnet at scrapyard

A patient, a doctor and a deep sea diver