The Worry Warriors Gifts

"These are the Fortneys. The Fortneys are young worrieds."

"Try thinking about something else."

Nervous Oral Testing

Mental Wellness Center. Some folks coming here are working on multiple issues. Earlier, I saw a germaphobe with a fear of flying. Using an airplane bathroom must be completely out of the question! There's a narcissist with math anxiety and a fear of public speaking. He hopes one day he can stand in front of a large audience and count all the wonderful qualities he believes he has. And that guy has claustrophobia combined with a fear of success. Looks like he's going through a rough period

That party went well.

"Why can't I get anything done unless I'm totally stressed out about it?" "Is it possible to be relaxed and still be productive?" "What is wrong with my brain?" "Why don't you work better?"

"Honey, can you read through our list and let me know if I forgot anything?"

A Hypochondriac's Worst Nightmare

"Look! A dying brain cell! Maybe we should help!...."

Introducing Ambient Books: No beginning...no middle...no end...just a bunch of sentences specially written to soothe and relax the reader.

"Returning to standard time is always difficult. I gain an hour of worrying."

Workaholics Anonymous meeting: 'No one showed up. Everyone is working.'

Some of us are calm on the surface but paddling like crazy underneath, and some of us are just the opposite.

"Do you cover hypochondria?"

'I can't sleep for thinking about global warming.'

"I made a list of all my symptoms. Lost the list. Can't remember any of my symptoms now."

'Life isn't fair! Most of the stuff I worried about over the years never even happened!'

Woman in bed with catalogue of worries.

Mrs. Tree? A hockey ball hit your daughter. It's likely just a bad bruise. Whew! Though there could be a fracture, nerve damage or fatal blood clots. What? Don't worry. Our medical advisor is evaluating Twig right now. Can you sign this liability waiver? Her hand seems fine. Team lawyer.

Doctors often have to reassure the worried well.

"It used to be that if you worried about unseen forces you were considered paranoid. Now you're a security expert."

"But why not be happy about all the diseases you don't have?"

'I'm worried about not being worried...'

And just how long have you had this impending feeling of doom?

'Aunt Joan and Uncle Wally took Luci to the emergency room.'

"Like WikiLeaks has nothing better to do."

Concern Chart

"My problem is I obsess over whether I worry enough."

"Well, nothing shows up on the tests. Your headaches are probably just stress related."

No Action Comics

'You worry too much. Next time something goes wrong, try blaming someone else.'

"Do you have to write down all the things you need to worry about?"

Horses are nervous animals. . .

Graham and his amazing anxiety

"Brenda's always been a bit of a worrier."