The Bard Buff Gifts

The British Hamlet ('Alas poor Yorick, I knew him ...I say 'knew', more of an acquaintance really ...')

'On your mark. Get set. Create!'

'Sire, your new fortress was fine for your nephew's fifth, but I fear it is set for a sterner test.'

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

Knight Golfing

'How's everyone doing tonight - that is the question.'

"Be creative...!"

"For the last time, I’m not Bigfoot — I’m Larry from Vermont!"

Joe's 'Take Responsibility For Your Own Actions' Bar.

'The next piece contains sex, violence, and Homeric epithets.'

"Our focus group will butcher your focus group."

Missing You.

Shakespeare's Lost Play: The Taming of the Pooch.

Baseball batting cage theater La Cage Aux Folles.

"You sure you guys don't spike the coffee?"

"This next one is a typical blues number about exceeding your data plan limit, cracking your ipad screen, and losing your new ear buds."

"To begin with, I would like to express my sincere thanks and deep appreciation for the opportunity to meet with you. While there are still profound differences between us, I think the very fact of my presence here today is a major breakthrough."

"Say! While I'm off in the Holy Land, why don't you find a little crusade of some kind that interests you?"

'You've had enough.'

"Oh look Pharaoh a miniature replica of your final resting place."

Knights of the Square Table.

'You can't recuse yourself from a war!'

RIP William Shakespeare: To be or not to be...

"Never gonna give thou up -- Never gonna let thou down -- Never gonna run around and desert thouuuuuu."

"As it happens, we don't produce any beer flavored wine."

"You fools! That's not the boiling oil, that's my beef casserole!"

"Can you do battle with him later?... He's watching, 'Game of Thrones'."

"One of you go see who's at the door."

'I hate to tell you this, but there was a hole in my pocket, and I lost the budget surplus.'

"It takes me only one drink to get drunk. Its either the seventh or eighth."

"Are you sure? It doesn't look like a diet pill!"

A medical office filing cabinet has drawer labels that read, 'X-Rays,' 'Lab Work,' and 'Exam Room Banter'

"With a little luck he'll be a benevolent teenager."

"You never know what will catch on!"

"This is the first time you've ever planned a moat, I'm guessing?"