Texting Tactician Pillows

'Writing is just like texting except you have to use all of the letters in each word.'

'Bailiff, would you please send a text to, juror #2 and instruct him to put his phone away.'

'When I texted you all regarding the manner in which he died, I was disappointed by how many of you responded with 'lol'.'

'Sir, we're txting the enemy!'

'Looks like your cash cow just got diverted to the slaughterhouse.'

'Sir, your tweeting coach is here.'

'So far, sir, we've rejected plans A,B, C, D, E, F, and right now we're evaluating'G'.'

"That was a rumor day."

"So this is it...the first day of the new school year. I guess studying, tests and report cards are still the hot things around here."

". . . and that dumb Mrs. Parker could have figured I had the Ace, King and Jack, but no, she goes ahead bidding in hearts. . ."

'Well, I'm glad to have you with us!'

"Tell us again — a little less graphic."

Being unable to clearly articulate responses to interview questions is a common mistake...

Man and bird

"Miss. Wilcox, get me the coast."

"I have the new list of approved tweets."

'Oi, do you mind, trying to speak to my colleague - two self service tills having a chat together.'

"I know I told you to fool him into thinking you've got nothing left, but now you've got me convinced."

'Remember, shares can also go down...'

"You didn't let me win; I let you lose."

"I haven't been in any academic journals but I do get my Tweets re-Tweeted a lot."

'Queen you? There's no queen in checkers, and never has been or will be.'

'Better get used to player rotation!'

"Buy on the dip, ignore the blip, and sell before the bubble bursts."

'I don't know about you, Sam, but so far my clients aren't going for this cross between tradtional and online trading.'

The invisible hand of the marketplace.

Wi-Fi password?

"Can you fit our annual report into 140 characters or less?"

'Cap'n, why's the enemy fire so accurate after we deployed the smoke screen?'

'Gee, I'd like to help you folks out, but I'm just a character assassin.'