Telescope Terrorist Gifts

Cola Observatory

"Lemme know when you’re ready to howl at it."

"Honestly, I didn't know your wife was in the shower."

'Slip Ahoy!'

'As far as clock watching goes, you take the biscuit.'

"New researches use it in daylight hours only."

'My God we being invaded!'

"Hurray! I discovered a new planet!"

How Patrick Moore chooses a hotel..."Hmmm four stars".

"I've either discovered dark matter, or I've left the lens cap on."

Galileo describes his discoveries to the church (and gets hit over the head by the bishop/pope with the telescope that he made the discoveries with).

'It's a black hole! Wait, what's all that debris? It looks like...hey, it's my letters to the editor, and my movie script submissions, and all the ideas I've ever put in the suggestion box.'

No caption. (An astronomer looks through a high-powered telescope while a baby in a crib looks through a hand-held scope).

Venice 1609: Someone plays a practical joke on Galileo. . .

Astronomers studying the 26 moons of Uranus...

'He runs this firm like a ship.'

'Hey, guys, come over here. I just discovered the telescope.'

"As an astronomer, this discovery heralds a new golden age of academic fervor for mathematicians and astrophysicists across the globe. As a Sagittarius, I'm fucked."

Scientist drinking night sky through telescope

'The last thing I said to him was: 'whatever you do, don't look at the sun through this thing'.'

Astronomers using giant telescope to light fires.

Alien surrendering to huge telescope because it looks like a gun

Solar Range.

Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune, Earth, Venus, Mars … Mercury … Um, Pluto? Charon? No, Pluto … or Eris? Ugh …

The Moon Falls Out of the Sky.

"All I get is a bird's eye view."

New Images from Hubble

Les Bons Bourgeois - Looking in vain for the planet Leverrier

Buffering

Testing the Big Bangs theory.

'Bad news, fellas... it's inventory time.'

'Watch this space.'

"I've made a discovery about our universe! It turns out you aren't the center of it Tim."

'First snowdrop.'

'Maybe the Universe isn't expanding -- maybe it's just you.'